7 Things You Fear Before Turning 30

Pearls Before Swine

make-your-own

  • You can no longer blame the childish things you do on your youth. You think of ways to be as immature as possible before leaving the 20s club.

  • You’ll get fat. You’ll definitely get fat. You picture yourself grossly overweight with eight kids. You work out as much as possible before your birthday.

  • Kids will call you old. You try to say something hip to sound cool. You forget hip went out ages ago. You just said hip and ages in the same sentence. Your nieces roll their eyes. Your nephews shake their heads. You walk off in shame.

  • You wear a smirk at the possibility of catching up with your husband’s age. You’ll both be in the 30s now. You think you’re winning. You forget he’s nine years and four months older than you are and is on his way to the 40s club.

  • Speaking of 40, birthdays will…

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